a good deal, a big deal?

I dislike so-called advice goddess Amy Alkon's column because her articles are garrulous, pointlessly sarcastic and occasionally verge on misogynistic. But I read them from time to time - mostly to try to guess how Hax, whom I adore, or even that insipid Annie's Mailbox, who 99 percent of the time never say anything useful - or anything at all, really, except "Please seek counseling" - would respond to the same issue.

Recently came across this column, which I had to laugh about because it underscores a recurring theme in Cub & Cat's marriage. Not the finance issue, but the "Really? You're going to make a big deal about THAT?" issue.

Funny. Is it a $40 ski jacket, or is it one of a thousand reasons the man has a mountain of credit card debt?

Sometimes all you have to do is tip your head a shade to the right and squint your eyes a bit - et voilà - you can see the view from the other side.

For a relationship to work, you need to find "that thing your partner does" endearingly annoying as opposed to annoyingly annoying...even if you can't buy into their notion that the fundamental human needs are air, water, food, shelter and bugging the dog with the coolest new battery-operated, radio-controlled helicopter.

-- Amy Alkon